


inchman

by undread



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, Dangan Ronpa: Trigger Happy Havoc
Genre: Implied/Referenced Character Death, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Kinda a vent, Owada Daiya's Death, Sibling Jealousy, Sibling Rivalry, Survivor Guilt, author has brother issues, but like one sided sibling rivalry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-12
Updated: 2020-11-12
Packaged: 2021-03-10 06:34:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 449
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27530068
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/undread/pseuds/undread
Summary: it's never been worse
Relationships: Owada Daiya & Owada Mondo
Kudos: 10





	inchman

A desperate need to be noticed, a desperate need to be validated in the eyes of others, pushing him and pushing him as far as it could. The need to be stronger, tougher, because he's never strong enough. Never good enough. He always needs to keep up, he can't fall behind. He can't fall behind. _People need to see him, he can't fall behind._

He wants to be loved. He wants to be noticed and validated and loved, he wants a hug, really. He doesn't want the sex or the drugs or the alcohol, he wants someone to see past his façade of strength. He wants someone to notice that he is a walking cry for help and he wants someone to give him a _fucking_ hug.

Daiya never noticed. He doesn't think Daiya noticed, at least. That desperate claw for strength culminating in the elder's death was a demand for recognition. The scene replays in his head every time he sees a truck- he can feel everything as if it had just happened. The rain on his face, the feeling of his legs scraping the concrete, the sound of his bike running off the ground, the sound of the truck horn, the sound of Daiya in his last moments. He hates the gang for being proud of him for what happened. He hates Daiya, a little bit, for letting it get that bad. He hates himself for letting it get that bad, too.

When his dad would hit him, he knew that bastard didn't love him. Daiya never hit him, but he wonders if his brother actually loved him anyway. Daiya must have loved him, because he took care of him for so long. The older Owada was his hero- he heralded Daiya as a being who could do no wrong, he heralded Daiya as a god, practically. Maybe that's another reason he wanted to surpass Daiya so bad. Maybe he convinced himself that Daiya was a better person than he actually was.

The reason doesn't matter all too much anymore, he supposes. Daiya's dead. He can't change that. Daiya is dead and it's his fault. Daiya's dead and he can't go a day without thinking about it. He doesn't know how to cope and he doesn't even know if he deserves to. Whether Daiya was a good person or even a good brother doesn't matter. Mondo killed him.

A desperate need to be noticed, to be validated in the eyes of others. The need and want to be loved plagues Mondo's soul and it made Mondo kill someone he cared about. One day it'll kill Mondo too, of that he's sure.

He'll keep waiting for that hug.

**Author's Note:**

> i be like purposefully makes it harder for myself by only name-dropping the main character at a specific time bc its :sparkles: deep and symbolic :sparkles:


End file.
